Present.

There's an older woman at church who regularly does something so meaningful, yet so simple, that she probably doesn't even realize she's doing it.

During the meet and greet time of service (aka, the worst 3 minutes of an introvert's life), she approaches and says, "How are your babies doing?" She might be including Justin too (haven't established this), but what she's truly saying is, "How are your dogs doing?" But she calls them babies, signifying their place in my heart.

She does it with sincerity and it's evident that she actually wants to know the answer. She knows, while some might belittle an animal's role in our lives, that they are a huge part of mine.

They are my present. In them, I find joy.

It's not like this is news to anyone. I have nothing short of 3,746 pictures of them on social media.

But the reason it's significant is because we live in a world where people rarely relish in other people's present. They can always have more children. They can always get a better job. They can always find their spouse a little faster. We begin to dread interaction with those that we crave interaction from because it's tiresome; it's physically and emotionally exhausting.

So far, having children has been an unsuccessful two-year journey for me. I say that, not to solicit sympathy or advice, but to better illustrate my overall message.

I want people to invest in my present; to enjoy my present with me; to ask about my present.

When pictures or talk of my dogs evoke comments like, "Ya'll need kids," or "Wait until you have kids," or somehow imply that my dogs are only fillers for kids, it's hurtful. Undermining my knowledge or ability to empathize with a situation because I'm childless is painful.

Because the truth is, this is my present. And most of the time, I am joyous in it. It's only when people fail to rejoice in it with me that the walls to that happiness begin to erode.

This post wasn't meant to be a scolding post. I realize most things that are said are unintentional and not meant to cause hurt feelings. I want you to know I'm not jotting down names and incidents in a revenge journal (watch yo back). I kid, I kid.

I only write this as a New Year's challenge. We may quit the gym and our diets after 2 weeks, but let's make a vow to live in the present with ourselves- and with our friends and family.

Ask them how they are doing now. Ask them how their parakeets are doing. Anything.

I promise you it will make their present brighter when the anxiety of the future starts creeping in.

Happy New Year!