Tough.

"Indeed, the world today is in a better, more enlightened place, where it's not nice to call people obscene or homophobic names. Where slapping people upside the head, beaning them with a basketball or giving them a swift kick in the rear is not considered the best motivational tactic. But the sports nation has not quite caught up with the rest of this kinder, gentler world. Frankly, I don't think it should -- not completely anyway."

This is a quote by the founding editor of ESPN The Magazine in response to the firing of Rutgers' coach Mike Rice for his offensive actions and slurs. She seems to me, throughout her opinion piece, to take a "boys will be boys" attitude when it comes to coaching and sports in general.

Let me be clear: I love sports. I played basketball and volleyball in high school and enjoyed intramural sports in college. It's definitely been a very important part of my life.

While I'm fortunate that I never had to experience a Mike Rice coach, I have seen enough to know exactly where I stand on the issue of bully coaching.

When, my friends, will "toughening up" stop being equated with constant ridicule, embarrassment and terrible language?

When will we stop jumping Algebra teachers for scolding our children's poor performance while we allow their coaches to degrade them to their very core?

Don't you dare spank your child, but please, by all means, stick them in a gym with a profanity-spitting tyrant. That's totally OK. Character building actually.

Highly controversial events like the Steubenville, Ohio case have negatively put young athletes in the public eye. Many would say that athletes, especially in small towns, live life like they are untouchable. Like the rules don't apply to them. Like they rule the town.

Kind of like... their coaches?

You think kids don't realize that their English teacher can't cuss them out but their coach can throw a clipboard at their head?

You think kids don't realize that a homophobic slur will land them in ISS while one shouted at them after a missed lay-up will go unnoticed?

You want to know why they think playing a sport makes them so gloriously almighty?

Because that's what you tell them. That's what I tell them. That's what we all tell them when we don't bat an eyelash at horrific behaviors because they involve a ball.

Society has made it very clear what we're cool with. And that's winning. Lots and lots of winning. We're all about booting out bad eggs until we start losing. We're all about abolishing bullying unless it happens on a court or football field.

The author of the quote above ends her thought with an open invitation: "Brutes will always have a seat at the sports table."

I won't be eating at that table. And I hope you won't either.