Year One.

This weekend we celebrate our first anniversary. How crazy is that? I can honestly utter that age-old cliche, "Where did the time go?" with the utmost sincerity.

There were a lot of great times. There were tough times. There were times when Justin probably said, "What is she going to do next?" There were days when I felt like wife of the year; and days where I felt like he should have married anyone else but me. But ultimately, I feel blessed. I have found the man who sees me for what I truly am: a beautiful mess.

It wouldn't be an Ashton post without some lists, right? So here's some findings I came across on this journey:

1. Everything prior to tying the knot is now historical and sentimental. It’s not like getting married is your old self dying a thousand deaths or anything. It’s just that your singlehood and everything about it has suddenly evaporated into this fog of mothball nostalgia.

One weekend, I kidnapped several of my Madame Alexander dolls and brought them home from my parents’ house. I put them on display at the end of the hall for a good 10 seconds before Justin and I unanimously agreed that it was too “Are You Afraid of the Dark?” (Classic Nickelodeon shout-out).

And I’m sure that Justin has already tired of the “I made 6 points in 6 seconds at the Manila tournament my senior year” story that gets brought up every time I see something that resembles a basketball.

Even the Searcy Sonic gets me rolling down memory lane as I recall the glorious summer they had Mango Limeades for a limited time only.

2. Holidays are now full of calculating and plotting. Remember when you hated that loud, crowded, stinky van ride with all your siblings on the way to your Christmas destination? After you get hitched, you want to just shout, “Just shove me in the van and let’s go. I don’t even care if we eat at that shady Mexican restaurant and hurl the rest of the way. Let's go, Pops.” But instead, it’s this balancing act of time, emotions, traditions and travel. January 1^st rolls around and you swear you will go postal if you see another turkey.

3. Your parents are in fact not alien creatures from another planet. You come to realize this for a number of reasons. Remember when your dad was an unreasonable, non-budging dictator who HAD to watch NCIS at 9 p.m. sharp or else? The man has 7^th graders blasting poorly-played trumpets in his ear all day. Can’t he have one hour and a bowl of popcorn to help solve a murder?

And your mom wasn’t trying out for Community Theater when she tearfully begged you to reconsider dating that one guy. She just knew that when you were actually married, you would thank God and a moment of clarity that you didn’t have to travel down this challenging road with a rusty clunker with mediocre people skills.

4. Marriage is not a competitive sport. Let me let you in on a secret: For every couple that seems to be going on a cruise every 2.5 seconds, there are 17 more that are watching Family Feud in bed with a dog sitting on their face. And for every couple that bought a new sectional, there are 14 that have to say, “Hey, sit on this side. It’s not caving in.”

5. You’re not going to have everything at once…and that’s OK. I guess I thought when you said “I do,” Bob Barker would open up the curtains and show you furniture, televisions, a washer and dryer set that doesn't wake up the whole neighborhood and a memory foam mattress that felt like heaven and marshmallows. Wrong. You’re going to get ottomans out of dumpsters and listen carefully when someone says they got a new dining room table. “What are you doing with the old one?” will become your mantra as you piece together your home one item at a time.

6. Don’t get in a rush. Nine months of marriage is like 25 years in “When are you having a baby?” years. As I told my dad, I’ll start thinking about it when your child support checks start rolling in. Be a little selfish for a while. Eat cookies for dinner sometimes. Don’t wake up every 2-3 hours. Enjoy your nasal hairs not trapping the smell of poop.

7. Create little but significant traditions. Almost every Friday, we go to Fuji’s for lunch and deem it “Fuji Fridays.” We have our nightly shows that we can’t wait to watch together. Next year’s goal: Make traditions that don’t involve eating and possibly involve going outside.

"Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate." ~Barnett R. Brickner