The Valentine Whine

People either reaaaaally love Valentine's Day or they reaaaaaally hate it. They either receive a teddy bear that barely fits into their house; or they receive an anonymous gift from their mother (been there, done that, got the roses.) I've already seen a few bitter diatribes pop up on my newsfeed.

From someone who has spent ample time on both sides of the romance fence, let me just say: February 14th is only as miserable as you make it.

When you're single, you get to watch gushing co-workers squeal all day long with glee; when you're married, you get to admire your roses until someone comes in and says, "I got a new SPORTS CAR!" (Also been there, done that, got the interior tour). You see, relationship status doesn't matter as much as attitude does. I could have been less grateful for my flowers. Or I could think, "Happy Monthly Car Payment, dollface." It was up to me.

Here's a few ways to turn that frown upside down before Thursday. I will try to debunk common excuses for seeing red (and pink).

• I want to show people I love them all the time, not just one day out of the year. Well, I want to give people mugs of hot cocoa and plaid shirts they'll never wear every day too. But since I can't physically and fiscally do that, I wait for Christmas. So keep on loving everyone, Cupid. 

• Valentine's Day is too commercialized and materialistic. Says the lady who bit a three-year-old on Black Friday to retrieve his Tickle Me Elmo. If you see a market and you capitalize on it, you're an innovative genius. If Hallmark does it, they invented a holiday. 

• It's Single Awareness Day. People are only as aware as you let them be. For all I know, you are dating Ryan Gosling and Channing Tatum at the same time right now. But if you announce it on every social media known to man, I become blissfully aware of your circumstance.

• I always end up with some weird secret admirer. Honey, there will come a day when the only mystery you get in a work day is "Who is the post-El Acapulco bathroom phantom?" Cherish these moments of secrecy and intrigue. 

• "Guess I'll just have to go out with my girlfriends and show the whole world I don't need a man to have fun!" While I don't think tagging out of seeing the latest Nicholas Sparks flick is high on the male list of things to cry about, I do think that there will come a time when you will miss this. Don't congregate and bemoan your perpetual single state. Enjoy your time. Enjoy not having baby spit-up on your clothes. Enjoy having the extra cash to eat at TGIFridays. Don't make it a back-up plan; make it THE plan.

• There's Valentine's candy and stuffed animals everywhere. I can't get away from it. Walgreen's may look like Cupid shot it with a love machine gun, but look at it this way: every piece of chocolate paradise that is shaped like a heart has like double the peanut butter, double the caramel, double the whatever-you-want. From one candy addict to another, Valentine's Day is where it's AT. 

• I won't even like Valentine's Day when I have someone. It's stupid. Yeah. Yeah, you kind of will. So stop saying this.

I feel like I can write this because I spent years being this person. I avoided the dorm lobby on Valentine's Day like the plague. During the far and few between times I had a boyfriend, I dreaded the "What did you get?" questions.

I will say it becomes a little much for me at times; but ultimately, my happiness, contentment or lack thereof is dependent on me. And that's a truth that shoots straighter than any arrow to the heart.

"I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day.  When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon."  ~Author Unknown