A crumpled piece of computer paper hangs crooked on the bathroom wall. It has seen more graffiti than it has consideration; it has collected more germs than it has glances. "Bullying will not be tolerated at this school," it reads in bold Times New Roman font.
It is our way of appeasing laws that hold us even more responsible for the lives of other human beings. It enables us to watch it hang there and feel like we did our part.
If a parent put up a sign in their home that said, "No touching the stove," but sat idly by while their child severely burned their hand, we would be outraged--and demand punishment. But in our schools, in our society, putting up a sign is a box that is checked off and never looked at again.
A family from our church has been battling the Jonesboro School District seeking some resemblance of justice for their son Dylan who was beat up by several students after school. Though any child would be traumatized, Dylan is autistic, which heightens his fear to endure the junior high environment.
The school and administration has seemed to take a stance of nonchalance. The students responsible are going about their daily lives, probably treating other children with the same meanness. Pleas for resolution or a public statement have gone unanswered.
And we wonder, we wonder why kids don't trust us. We wonder why they would rather talk to an online stranger playing video games than confide their deepest feelings. We lose our faith in them. We groan about what they haven't contributed to our world.
But how can they ever rise to where we want them to be if we, as grown adults, repeatedly push them back down?
Kids are smart. And they can call our bluff immediately. A new study out shows that in only a single interaction, children can determine which adults to trust for truthful information. One interaction. Most adults date pathological liars for three years before they reach such a conclusion.
More than a rant, this is a call for us to replace signs with sincerity, to replace apathy with action. Bullies become bullies because they are allowed to continue their habitual behavior with no consequences. Our job is not to combat bad parenting, which is inevitable, it is to pick justice and compassion over intimidation. I don't care if their parent heads up your school fundraiser -- be courageous. I don't care if the kid even scares the pants off of you -- be courageous. I don't care if the victim isn't your brightest pupil -- be courageous.
Because bullies don't just stuff kids in lockers and dunk their heads in toilets. They don't just cuss and call you bad names.
They also come in another form: people who have been given all the tools to help who refuse to step in.
Gandhi once said that "Action expresses priorities."
What are ours?
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